The Mundane
by Totoro504
Summary: "OW! CAREFUL WITH THE FACE, IT ATTRACTS THE...ladies ." Xin Yue was just a young boy who got along with everyone at school. Xin Yue was also a tiny girl that had an urge to sit around at home naked and watch shoujo animes. Inevitably, both the Xin Yue wanted to be fed and left alone by the stupid prefect. "Do I know a faggotron like you?" HibariXOC
1. Chapter 1

**Me: It's been so long since I have wrote fanfiction. Getting a boyfriend and having a social life made me forget about my anime life quite a lot until I started convincing my boyfriend to start watching anime with me. Now I'm back into watching it, and I'm ready to write! THIS TIME I HAVE MORE EXPERIENCE WITH ROMANCE. HUEHUEHUEHUEHUE. :D I think I'm going to try to make this a little more serious this time. **

**Gokudera: Feh! Then this story actually ends up more on the humorous side. Just like The Narcoleptic Girl.**

**Me: I TRIED. **

**Yamamoto: Yeah Gokudera! Don't be so harsh!**

**Gokudera: SHUT UP.**

**Me: THAT'S WHAT YOUR MOM SAID.**

**Gokudera: She's dead.**

**Me:...That's what your mom is. **

**Gokudera: FUCK YOU.**

**Yamamoto: Katekyo Hitman Reborn belongs to Amano Akira. Characters and plot was borrowed only for a fan's dream!**

**Me: Guys, I was just kidding when I said I was going to make this story more serious. SERIOUS IS BORING. HURRAY FOR DIRTY JOKES. By the way, the idea where my character is a girl and can turn into a guy when splashed with cold water was inspired by Ranma 1/2 and my dear friend Yanase, also going by The Fool Arcana (she's got two accounts, one is a backup). Guys, you should check out her profile and read her stories! DO IT AS A FAVOR FOR ME...If you even know me.  
**

* * *

**Chapter One**

"Hey man, share some of your food or else I'll give you my D." A young Chinese boy that had white unkempt silky locks as hair matching his incredibly pale face, and large gold eyes, stared at his classmate. His lips had formed into a pout, and he was sniffling while poking the sporty looking classmate with a finger. "Come on bruh! Be a good man! I forgot my lunch!" he moaned in distress, sniffling. He had a thick Chinese accent that was hard to miss. Thankfully the Japanese students were intelligent and could decipher what he was trying to say. His poor communication skills with vivid hand signals did not help, and it mainly caused a distraction compared to just listening to him speak.

The sporty guy laughed jokingly while saying, "Screw you! You always forget your lunch at home!"

"That's rude man. Take it back or I'm going to slap your face with my dick," Yue cried loudly, despite having a cheeky grin on his face.

"You're right man, I'm sorry...L-O-L Just kidding. Fuck you. You know I hate sharing my sexy mac and cheese." With that, the unnamed guy downed his food in one go. The classmates laughed wholeheartedly at the strange behavior the two had displayed, mainly at the Chinese boy. The young man dropped to his knees dramatically. Real tears had begun pouring out his eyes, snot dripping out his nose, and he slammed his fist on the ground repeatedly. He was crying profusely out of hunger and sadness.

**"YOU PIECE OF SHIET."**

It's been exactly half a year since Xin Yue transferred to Namimori. He arrived during junior high school in the middle of the first semester. He made a couple of friends here and there, but rarely hung around a certain crowd for a long period of time. The Chinese boy had a bad habit of always wandering around because he got extremely bored quickly. Luckily, due to his attractive appearance and likable personality, Yue certainly had a good image with majority of the students at school. The dumb students of course; the intelligent students steered clear of his presence because of his stupidity.

"Score! The girls gave me melon bread!" Yue exclaimed with joy. He began stuffing his abnormally large mouth with food eagerly, a blissful expression on his face as he skipped down the hall gaily. Yue abruptly came to a halt and his face turned sour. His mood had been completely ruined by something—more like _someone. _

"Xin Yue, you have yet to dye your hair to a natural hair color." Hibari Kyoya, the sexy handsome prefect that all girls secretly wanted to do. What a shame too. He was such a hottie yet he had a shitty personality. Surely if he was much nicer and smiled once in a while (maybe twerk five times a day in just boxers), a lot of girls would be at his feet begging for him to deflower them. Yue would have wanted him to deflower the boy too. Except there was two problems. One: Yue was a guy and homosexuality wasn't accepted (publicly for now). Two: Because Yue was a guy, Hibari showed him no mercy compared to the females. Once you break a law of his, he's going to take his tonfa and make you cry with just a flick of his wrist—if said person who broke law is unlucky. _Unless it's a female. _Wretched foul women were lucky to escape his wrath majority of the time.

"B-But Hibari-san!" Yue squeaked. His voice turned oddly high-pitched for a guy. "This is my natural hair color! We've been through this many times!"

"Don't lie to me Xin Yue," Hibari said sharply, narrowing his eyes at him. "You're not even wearing the correct shoes in school _or_ a proper tie."

He gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. "Uhh...The fan girls took it and sold it on eBay?"

"I highly doubt that."

"I love you?"

"I'll bite you to death." Yue let out an agonizing scream. "Herbivore, I haven't even hit you yet."

"...Oh. You did throw out your catchphrase though. Once the word bite processes through my head, I scream because you hit me after that. _Usually_." He paused and chuckled hesitantly, his eyes darting back and forth from Hibari and to the open windows rapidly. "Can I at least try to escape?"

"No." Yue did not have time to throw himself out the window and evade his punishment because the prefect had grabbed him by his ankle in the middle of a jump and dragged him to hell forcefully. Errm...the Reception Room actually. Which in all reality was labeled hell because majority of the students dragged in there came out traumatized for life and obeyed school rules afterwards...Then there were people like Yue. He came to the room frequently that he had become friends with all of the committee members unintentionally. Albeit always coming out with some sort of injury, it would be gone the next day. Chinese medicine had magical powers apparently.

**"OW! CAREFUL WITH THE FACE, IT ATTRACTS THE..._ladies~._"**

Yue winked to the audience before getting beaten up by a disgusted prefect.

* * *

Yue was grumbling curse words under his breath in Chinese on his walk home. Hibari was always trying to pick a fight with him. He never did anything wrong at all. Okay...so maybe the first time they met, he _may _(did) have called him the N word and tried to high-five him. To be fair, it didn't end in -er but -a. So it was all good. For now. Until black people started rioting over Asian people using the word; even if they threw the term Chink out there like it was nothing. Yue huffed and fished his keys out the back pocket of his pant and jammed it in the keyhole, jiggling it before unlocking the door. Twisting the golden knob open, Yue entered his house calmly. A bucket of steaming hot water attached to the ceiling with a wire tied to it, tipped over and dumped its contents on the Chinese boy.

A feminine sigh was released and Yue suddenly shrunk from 5'4 to 5 feet. Short unkempt hair had become long and a young fifteen-year-old with a narrow face appeared. She was thin and small—a complete midget. Stretching out her arms, she yawned loudly and shut the door behind her. Making her way to the kitchen, she began stripping the boys uniform off of herself while digging around for food. "Thank goodness Hibari-san didn't hurt my face. That's the only beautiful thing I have left. Well besides my precious jewels." She had a lecherous smile on her face whilst pulling out ten ramen cups. Even as a female, her stomach didn't change. She was a black hole ready to inhale anything edible.

This _girl_ was Xin Yue. The same Xin Yue seen at school walking around with a hot dog hanging between _his _legs and a dumbfound expression. Presently, the naked Xin Yue with nothing dangling between her leg was running around the house singing obnoxiously. She turned on the TV to watch a re-run of Kaichou Wa Maid-Sama episodes. A cheerful smile was on her face as she hummed the theme song before getting up to turn off the stove and pour the boiling water in _ten _cup of noodles. Although she ate so much, her metabolism was fast and she forced herself to exercise to keep looking healthy and stay strong.

All of a sudden, her cellphone begun to ring in the middle of the anime. Blinking, Yue slowly crept towards the cellular device and checked the caller. The number wasn't familiar. Flipping the electronic open, she answered, "Yellow~? Rapist here to answer your every questions. Each question costs 500 yen. Nothing personal please. I don't like to getting too close to my clients. "

Another person, a _man, _sighed on the other end of the line. His voice was smooth, gentle, and definitely suave. It made almost any girl's knees week and shaky. Key word: Almost. Yue recognized his voice immediately. _"I see you're enjoying the life of being a regular student." _It was Mandarin Chinese. Her language.

Yue switched to her native tongue, "Awww. Come on Master. What did you expect from me? I'm the cursed girl who turns into a boy whenever cold water is splashed onto me. You honestly can't expect me to be happy being stuck in the mafia do you? Finally having not to deal with them is great. I feel normal for once—even with my curse."

There was a chuckle. _"You stayed in the restroom for two hours playing with your privates and giggled quite loudly. I don't think you can ever be considered normal."_

"I was eight!"

_"You did that a month ago when I came to visit you."_

She bit her lip. "Point taken. Did you need something or are you just checking up on me in case the prefect had slaughtered my very beautiful body and dumped it in the river?" Okay, so the Chinese girl could be a bit narcissistic. "Everyone loves me after all." _Extremely narcissistic. _

_"Both." _

Yue groaned and rolled her eyes. Despite quitting the mafia, her master had always bothered her for little stuff like contacting the crazy people involved with it. Last time she almost got herself killed because the client thought she was a spy for a different famiglia. She wasn't even in a famiglia to begin with. "Details. Now. I want to hurry up and get the task done before it turns completely dark."

_"I dropped off a package in front of your house. I need you to deliver it to a person named Sawada Tsunayoshi and have him give it to someone named Reborn. Is that simple enough?"_

"Fine. But please give me an extra allowance next time so I can buy more food," the girl grumbled irately.

_"I will. Thank you Yue," _the man said fondly, before hanging up.

"AWWW MAN! NOW I HAVE TO PUT CLOTHES BACK ON!" The young girl scrambled to find clothes around the dirty house before the sunset.

* * *

Yue felt absolutely ridiculous running around Namimori. She had no clue where Tsuna lived, and her master had forgotten to give her the address. The sun was about to set soon, and felt gross and sweaty. Urgh. Summer coming way too soon for her. It was ridiculous because she hated the sun and its dreadful heat that burned rays upon her precious pale skin. Stomping around in circles, she got frustrated and kicked the wall. "DAMN YOU SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI. WHERE ARE YOU?"

"What type of business do you have with him?" A cold voice cut through the air sharply. The Chinese girl winced, recognizing the voice automatically. This person was the cold-hearted bastard that tortured her everyday at school. Taking her time to turn around, she met slated gray-blue eyes belonging to the one and only Hibari Kyoya. He inspected her appearance and blinked. "Xin Yue, I had no idea that you were into cross dressing."

She glanced down at herself. She was wore wedges to boost up her height, short jeans, and a large stylish hoodie. Shit. She had to come up with a lie. A good one at that! _And_ she needed good acting skills too. Furrowing her eyebrows, she tilted her head and pursed her lips together. Yue began speaking in Chinese, "_Do I know a complete faggotron like you?"_

"I understand Chinese. Say something insulting again and I'll send you to the hospital." His eyebrow had twitched before adding calmly, "I heard you speaking Japanese before. Don't pretend you don't understand what I'm saying, Xin Yue." Forcefully, he grabbed her wrist and yanked her towards him. Yue stumbled, shrieking like a banshee. "You are Xin Yue, correct? Lie to me and prepare to be faced with consequences."

"WAAHHH! OKAY! I'M INTO CROSS DRESSING! I'M SORRY HIBARI-SAN! UHH HIBARI-SAMA!" Yue squeaked. Thank goodness her male counterpart shouted like a little whiny girl. "SPARE ME! I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING BAD YET!"

Hibari narrowed his eyes. There was something _off_ about the supposedly Chinese boy. "Why does your face look more girly than usual?" (He had said _than usual_ at the end of his question. Did it mean Yue looked like a female even in her male form?) The prefect squinted. Yue looked a lot thinner and smaller too. How strange.

"It's make-up!" Yue lied, trying to be a spontaneously good liar. "Once I wash the make-up off my face, I'll look normal! I can prove it, I swear!" At least if she threw cold water on herself, she can return to a boy. Surely he wouldn't be so suspicious then.

"Hn." After a while of debating, Hibari decided it wasn't worth his time to deal with the Chinese boy (girl). "Whatever. If I find you wearing inappropriate school uniform or breaking any school code from now on, mark my word, everyone will know about your secret hobby. Do I make myself clear?"

She gulped. "Y-Yes sir. B-but uhh...this is my natural hair color..._still._" Didn't Hibari know that all important characters in a fanfiction or anime was supposed to have different colored hair or eyes? Ugh. The prefect had a smug look on his face for having something to use against her. Yue's hands balled up into a fist, tempted to punch him right in the throat. Although she was friendly towards everyone at school, Hibari pissed her off easily and got under her skin without even trying. The sad part, was that he _scared _her; Hibari was intimidating. She huffed and checked the time, grimacing. "Hibari-san, do you know where Sawada Tsunayoshi lives? I need to give him something." Hastily, Yue added, "He dropped his wallet at school."

"Two houses down to your right," he stated blankly, before turning away and leaving.

"Uhhh...thanks," she mumbled. Once far away she whispered under her breath, "_Faggotron." _Hurrying down the road, she made it to the Sawada Residence and rung the doorbell. There was a bunch of loud movements coming from the inside of the house with obstreperous yells. "Excuse me! I'm here to deliver a package to Sawada Tsunayoshi!" The house became eerily silent, and the door creaked open. A boy with wide eyes and spiky brown hair showed up. He smiled nervously.

"I-I'm Sawada Tsunayoshi." Who the hell was the white-haired girl standing in front of him? He furrowed his eyebrows in concentration. She had the same features of someone he saw at school: white hair, pale skin, gold eyes, and thick Chinese accent.

"I have something to deliver to you from my Master. You have to give it to Reborn."

"Umm..." Tsuna frowned. The young girl had some sort of involvement with the mafia. Figures. Anyone who shows up at his door were constantly associated with the Italian criminals. "Of course."

"Right. So here's the packa—..." In the midst of digging in her jacket, Yue stopped. Her face morphed into fright. She broke out into a wail, "I FORGOT TO BRING IT! NOOOOOO. HOW STUPID CAN I GET? I SPENT TWO HOURS JUST TRYING TO FIND YOUR HOUSE AND I HAD TO DEAL WITH THIS STUPID BASTARD. FINALLY. **FINALLY**. WHEN I GET HERE I DISCOVER. **I. LEFT. IT. AT.** **HOME**." Yue promptly had a nervous breakdown, bawling. "NOW I WON'T EVER GET PAID. I'LL BE STARVING."

"..." Tsuna closed the door and turned around and said, "Sorry Okaa-san, there was a stranger outside the door."

* * *

Returning to school the next day with a small box in his hand, Yue's mood had become rotten that day. He—as in she being in her male form—had avoided talking to anyone that morning. He had nothing to eat for breakfast, he was poor and couldn't buy food, and then he woke up late. He still had to find this certain brat named Sawada Tsunayoshi. Striding down the hall in long steps, Yue blinked. He found him. He had found the target and it did not take him over two hours. Yue pushed aside a silver-haired boy heading near Tsuna and dived forward to get in front of the doorway of class 1-B. The short brown-haired boy jumped, shocked. "HIIIEEEEE!"

"SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI!"

"Y-Yes!" Huh, this strangely feminine boy seemed oddly familiar. Tsuna's eyes dropped down to a yellow package in the Chinese his hands and it clicked. "A-Are you the older brother from the girl who came to my house yesterday?"

"Older brother? Huh?" Yue blinked. His lips then formed an 'O' and he blushed, abashed. "Uhhh. Yeah, sorry about that. She's crazy. I had forgotten to give her your address so she went completely ballistic when she got home." Inwardly Yue was screeching, _Bullshit! Master forgot to give me the address and I got lost._

Tsuna shook his head and smiled understandingly, "It's fine." Wow, the girl from yesterday's brother was extremely nice _and _normal. He accepted the package from Yue, "I'll give it Reborn the next time I see him," he mumbled. The soon to be mafia boss hoped that it wasn't something unpleasant to put the tutor in a bad mood. Tsuna was always on the end whenever Reborn was. Last time, Reborn had almost set all of his boxers on fire. How embarrassing would it have been to be shot with the dying will bullet and then run around completely naked with his ding dong flopping all over the place?

"Thanks—Ho shit!"

A hand grabbed Yue by the back of the head and smashed his face into the doorway. Tsuna shrieked. "Take that you bastard! You were trying to steal Juudaime away from me, weren't you!" Gokudera Hayato, the right-hand man of Tsuna for the Vongola famiglia, was full of fury. He had been shoved into the wall, _and _he was getting touchy with Tsuna. He'll make Yue pay.

"Gokudera-kun! He just had to give something to me for Reborn!" Tsuna yelled, trying to pull Gokudera away from the injured Chinese person.

"HAH?" His eyes went from the package in Tsuna's hands and back to Yue. "...Oh." Psh, well the bastard still deserved it since he pushed him into the wall.

"I'm sorry about what happened," Tsuna mumbled. "Gokudera-kun, please apologize!"

Yue rubbed his bleeding nose and wiped the red liquid on his sleeves, grinning toothily. "It's okay! We all have misunderstandings." _Besides, I'll get him back later. Slowly, but surely. _

"Did I miss something?" Yamamoto Takeshi, the star of the baseball team for Namimori Junior High, appeared in his almighty uniform looking fine as hell.

"DEAR SWEET JESUS YOU ARE HOT."

Yamamoto raised his eyebrow and hesitantly said, "Thanks?"

Yue realized his mistake and blushed a deep shade of magenta. "I mean uhh...Your muscles...I'm so envious of them because I look like a chicken."

"Oh, haha! Thanks! I do work out a lot for baseball!" Yamamoto smiled.

Gokudera meanwhile stated clearly, "You're definitely gay."

"Nah man, titties for life," Yue retorted without missing a beat.

"Excuse me?" A sharp voice cut in.

"Titties for life."

"I'll bite you to death."

"Wait wha—..." Yue sighed in realization and his shoulders dropped. "Dammit."

From afar, Reborn set down his binoculars and glanced at the data of the Chinese person in his laptop, smirking. "Xin Yue, previously a student of Fon and an ex-member of the mafia. Interesting."

"NO HIBARI-SAN! I DIDN'T MEAN WHAT I SAID!" Yue stubbed a toe on accident. "SONUVABI—"

"Very interesting indeed," Reborn muttered.

* * *

**Me: JESUS. I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER GET THIS FIRST CHAPTER DONE. Anyway, I don't expect it to be popular because my writing has been very off and the idea is definitely _whack,_ as my mom would put it. However, I would appreciate it if someone reviewed or critiqued it. It would be amazing. Okay? So please review. Favorites are nice but reviews are better. Right Gokudera?**

**Gokudera: Fuck you. And review. **

**Me: Right. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Me: So I checked the story for this and when I saw the reviews and favorites I got for one chapter, I was so shocked. I was about to cry happy tears because people actually reviewed! It was only the first chapter too. I LOVE YOU GAIS. *snot shoots everywhere with tears being wiped on Gokudera's sleeves***

**Gokudera: EW. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU.**

**Me: I'M SORRY, I'M JUST SO HAPPY.**

**Gokudera: SO? WIPE YOUR SNOT ON BASEBALL IDIOT!**

**Yamamoto: ^_^ Please don't.**

**Me: Yamamoto. DISCLAIMER.**

**Yamamoto: No.**

**Me: D:**

**Yamamoto: I'm mad that you never wrote a fanfic for me. Instead you write another one for**

**Hibari-san. :(**

**Me: But you're so easily friend-zoned...BESIDES WALLXYAMAMOTO.**

**Yamamoto: Oh yeah! :D Okie! _Katekyo Hitman Reborn_ belongs to Amano Akira and the idea _Ranma 1/2_ was borrowed by Rumiko Takahashi and Yanase (also The Fool Arcana) gave her the idea.**

**Me: PEOPLE, _PLEASE READ THE FRIGGIN AUTHOR'S NOTE_ EVEN IF IT'S SHIT. I DID CREDIT THE IDEAS TO THE PEOPLE. NOT STEAL IT.**

**Gokudera: Che! Fucking copy cat! No original ideas of your own eh?**

**Me: -_- I have ideas of my own. I just wanted to try out this girl-boy-cold-water shenanigan. It's fun by the way. Everyone should try writing it. :D**

* * *

**Chapter Two**

It was a dreadfully boring day in Namimori for a certain Chinese person. Yue was lazing around on the dirty floor in her house—sighing and rolling around in the dump she lived in. The unclothed female didn't know what she was doing with her life on a Sunday morning. Oh right, she was waiting for the _Sailor Moon_ re-run to come on TV. "Dang it, I'm so bored," she moaned. Her stomach growled. "And I'm hungry! Gotta feed myself before I my stomach will turn inside out and try eating me." Getting on her knees, she crawled around the living room's sofa and into the tiny kitchen, scrambling for any type of food in particular. "Damn it, I ran out. I don't even get allowances till next week."

The doorbell rang.

Yue blinked, glanced around the dirty house, before blinking again. "Shiieeet!" Jumping up, she scrambled around the house for baggy clothes before dumping cold water on herself. Yue, now male, hopped over to the doorway and swung it open. "Hello! Please tell me you have food or I will bite your hands off and cook it. I'm warning you, I'm not afraid to try cannibalism."

"Ciaossu." Where the heck did that come from?..._Oh_. Yue looked downwards to see a pimped out baby with sideburns. Maybe it was just him, but Yue had a bad feeling coming from this little kid.

"Hi...Midget," Yue greeted hesitantly. The baby had kicked him in the ankle. "OWWWW!"

"Humph. Looks like Fon didn't teach you how to respect your elders, " he stated clearly, his beady black eyes boring into Yue's teary gold ones. He pushed Yue aside and stepped into the small house, disgusted by the mess. "Nor did he teach you how to be clean." He eyed the boxers laying in a corner and empty bowls of ramen sitting on the table. "You live like a mutt."

Ignoring the rude comments he dropped snidely, Yue shut the door and whipped his head towards the stranger. "Who are you, and what do you want from me? More importantly, why did I even let you come inside my house? Something like this never happens in real life. _Or does it? _Hmmm."

"I'm Reborn. You delivered a package to Tsuna for me," Reborn said steadily, treading around the living room steadily. His eyes trailed upwards to the ceiling and caught sight of a large bucket with steam coming out. _Ah, there's the wire._ _If I can get her to stand there before I cut it, she'll definitely be in her true form._

Yue furrowed his eyebrows. "Wait, what does that have to do with me? It's from Master. I just delivered it for him because I get paid." His stomach let out an atrocious howl. Reborn chortled. Yue's head dropped down in shame. "I don't get paid well enough unfortunately, but I do get paid." Although Master Fon had actually told her he gave her a lot of money, and called her a pig as politely as he could.

"If you become guardian of the Moon for the Vongola famiglia, we'll feed you for free, " Reborn said, slowly reaching for a tiny knife in his back pocket.

"Uhh...but there's no Moon guardian. I mean, there probably was in an alternative universe that multiple writers created to be unique and special, but still."

"There hasn't been a Moon guardian created in this universe yet."

"Oh my gosh..." Yue felt his heart beating against his chest and he threw his hands in the air. "I KNEW IT. I KNEW MY NAME HAD SOME SORT OF RELEVANCE TO THE STORY AFTER ALL! IT'S NOT JUST BECAUSE IT WAS SHORT AND EASY TO REMEMBER FOR A CHINESE PERSON." He started jumping up and down excitedly, flailing his arms-oblivious to the hitman's actions. "I'M THE MOON GUARDIAN. Or should I say, _the_ _Yue guardian._"

Reborn merely flicked a lint off his Italian made suit. "I was testing to see how stupid you are."

"Did I pass?"

"No. You failed. Clearly, you're as dumb as a rock."

His mood suddenly dropped. "Does that mean I'm not going to be fed?" Reborn sighed and threw the knife, cutting the wire efficiently. The bucket tipped over and poured hot water down. Yue screeched, slipped on the sweater near his foot, and fell with the steaming liquid pouring down on his face. A feminine scream was released. "HOLY DAMN THAT'S HOT."

Reborn smirked. "You shouldn't be leaving things around that can give away your true identity easily, Xin Yue."

"You knew?!" Yue gasped, mouth dropped open.

"I looked up your background involved in the mafia. Every little detail from when you were born is in your file. You were born to a poor family in Beijing, China. Then you decided to take martial arts from Fon because you were inspired by Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan. During that time span, you somehow wounded up with a curse that manages to turn you into a male when splashed with cold water."

"Yeah! Well you forgot the part where I joined the mafia because they supplied free food!"

"Hn. What is your reason for quitting the mafia when you still could have been fed and clothed even more so compared to now?"

Without thinking, Yue readily answered, "Because I met this bastard from the Varia. He had taken my money, stolen my food, _called me a peasant_, before running off. Honestly, I thought he was twerking away with a tiara on his head, but whatever. When I tried to report him, they told me to leave it be due to the fact that he was higher ranking than me. IT WAS SO UNFAIR!"

"So you quit the mafia because of one person?"

"YEAH! BUT THE MAFIA WERE BEING UNFAIR TO ME."

"You are a true idiot," Reborn noted, taking account of all the things she told him. "You also need to take note on who to trust with all of your information. For all you know, I could have been an enemy ready to assassinate you."

"Oh..." Yue rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. "Are you?"

"No."

"Problem solved!"

_She would be a terrible addition the Vongola famiglia, but I see a potential in her. She's an idiot and a very irrational person. According to Fon, if I play my cards right, she could be very loyal to Tsuna and would make a huge impact on the Vongola in terms of strength. The big problem is her gluttony controls majority of her feelings and actions too easily. That could be a problem._ Reborn debated whether or not Yue was worth the trouble to add her to the famiglia.

Yue stepped on a roach crawling on the floor and dug in her nose for boogers. "So did you need anything from me?"

"Nothing in particular. Fon told me to check up on your living conditions and see if you were okay," He lied.

"I'm doing great!" Yue exclaimed.

"Clearly," Reborn stated, deadpanned.

"Sooo...Do you have any food?"

Oh boy. This was going to be a hard decision.

* * *

"Err...Reborn, why is Xin-san eating here for dinner?" Tsuna asked hesitantly, watching the Chinese boy shovel a bowl of rice down his throat hurriedly without choking. Was he even breathing with so much food going in his body? Tsuna wondered with curiosity, picking at his food slowly. At least he didn't eat everyone else's proportions. Yet.

"He had no more food at his house, he's poor, and hungry. Did you expect me to leave him to starve?" Tsuna honestly wanted to say yes because he knew Reborn would if he didn't have some form of ulterior motive up his ass. Deciding to be smart this time, Tsuna did not comment about it.

The hitman looked at Yue. "Do you plan to rejoin the mafia anytime soon after our deal finishes?"

Yue swallowed the last fried shrimp and wiped his mouth. "I don't think so. I decided I want to become an electrical engineer. I might get paid more and I won't have to deal with killing people or putting them in the hospital."

"That sounds like a great plan," Tsuna commented, smiling. _Wow, he's so smart to get out of the mafia while he can._

"It would be. If you weren't such a damn fool."

"What are you talking about?" Yue asked; he was more curious than offended.

"Your grades are terrible and you have the worst disciplinary records in the school. There is absolutely no way you'll even be able to get accepted into a university for engineering. At least with your brute strength and talent for getting the missions done quickly, you'll serve a great use to the mafia. You're a natural killer."

"You do have a good point, but it never hurts to give things a try. Like Obama Care back in America."

"Reborn! You can't talk about this type of stuff at the table!" Tsuna exclaimed.

"I don't see why not. Mama, has gone to finish the laundry. Lambo's a kid who never listens, I-pin only understands Chinese, and Bianchi already knows about her background."

"Her?" Tsuna paused. "Xin-san's a boy."

"I make no mistakes. That person is a female." There was a gun click. "If you dare mention Yue's real gender to anyone else, even to your subordinates, I won't hesitate to punish you."

Tsuna tried to reason with the tutor, "B-but Xin-san has been going to school with us for almost a year! How can he possibly be a female when he uses the men's restroom and locker room without getting caught? Plus he gets beaten by Hibari-san a lot. Surely if he was a female, someone must have noticed his "true gender" by now."

"Actually..." Reborn picked up his tea and splashed it on the Chinese boy's face lackadaisically. Yue grinned awkwardly, and she brushed the now long strands of hair out of her face and behind her ears. "I am a girl. I promise you I got no ding-a-ling between my legs. Right now at least."

"What!" Tsuna panicked. "But how! How are you a girl when you were a boy just a few seconds ago! Is this all an illusion like Rokudo Mukuro?"

"Rokufaggotron Taekwondo? Noooo dude, you got it all wrong. This is real. Look, just touch my titties. It's not an illusion." Reborn smacked her with Leon in a shape of a hammer. Her face slammed into her bowl and smashed it to pieces. Blood trickled down her face, and she merely wiped it on her sleeves.

"HIIIIEE! ARE YOU OKAY?" The wounds were already beginning to seal up. Tsuna gasped. "W-What's going on!"

"It's fine. I have flames of the sun so I can heal myself, " Yue grinned. "That means if I break my hymen when I do the dirty deed, I can—oomph!" Reborn hit her again.

"Haaa? Sun flames?"

Yue's expression became blank and she stared at Reborn. "Faggot. You didn't even tell him what the flames are? How the hell is going to handle the ba—oomph! OH GAWD THAT'S MY BUTTBONE!" She tried shaking off the pain, wiping her teary eyes away. "I-It's nothing. Mommy will tell you when you're a little bit older."

"Hah?"

"Anyway, Reborn offered me a proposition that I just couldn't refuse." Oh geezus. Please not let it be something terrifying. "He said I could join your famiglia and eat as much as I want as long as I am loyal to you. Like dogs. Dogs are loyal. Not that I am a dog of course. I mean, I wanted to try it this one (or maybe five) time in China, but yeah. Definitely not a dog. Just like a dog. You get what I'm saying dawg?" This was the most terrible news Tsuna had received all month.

"N-No." Oh gosh, she rambled too much. How was Tsuna going to even put up with her at all without getting annoyed?

"There you have it Tsuna. Your new subordinate. Take care of her, and make sure not to give away her secrets."

"B-But how did she umm...well...become a she in the first place when Xin-san was a boy a couple of minutes ago?"

"I am also curious." Everyone looked at her.

Yue sighed. "It all began when I was eight..."

**FLASHBACK**

_I remember I had recently became eight-years-old when Fon wanted to take all of his students to go the mountain to train, including me. It involved a spring of some sorts. A beautiful spring with many different ponds if you know what I mean. I suck at describing shit, so whatever. Well, we were climbing for hours and I was hot and sweaty, like those fat people that only work out for fifteen minutes for the first time. Naturally, when I had arrived and saw the water, I stripped off my clothes and just canon balled into one while whooping, "Poppeth thy pussy for a real nigga, Juliette."_

_Next thing I knew, when I resurfaced, I saw a bunch of shocked looks from Master Fon and my classmates. Something was unfamiliar was also hanging between my legs. I became a boy. Apparently, taking a dive in the pond to cool off myself was not a good idea because now I have no clue how to return to my female form permanently. The entire trip back home, everyone called me retarded because I didn't listen to Master talk about not touching the water for an hour. I just thought he was trying to hog it all for himself back then but damn. He didn't._

**END FLASHBACK**

"Which meant I was the only one to come back home from training with a curse since I didn't listen to Master's warnings for an hour," Yue sighed, acting as if her old memories were wonderful. She had a peaceful smile on her face. "My parents were so proud."

"You're stupid," Everyone at the table said.

"NUH UH."

Tsuna groaned. "Right. I'll be upstairs if you need me." He left the kitchen table after putting up his dishes. I-pin and Lambo followed him upstairs. Once Reborn and Yue were sure he was upstairs, she glanced at the baby.

"He honestly doesn't know the ring battle will be approaching soon?"

"Tsuna has no clue."

"And I'm supposed to be protecting the kids and girls when the battle starts and till it finishes?"

"If you want to be fed."

"Reborn, she doesn't have to take care of them. I can do it, " Bianchi offered. The poison cooking assassinator tried to be reasonable. "She seems unreliable, and we don't know if we can trust her. Her skills may have no use in protecting them compared to me."

"Bianchi, sometimes you are called out on missions to Italy. You may not always be there compared to her. She has no more involvement to the mafia compared to us and Fon, and she is currently living by herself here. She won't be busy. We can call her anytime if we wanted to. As long as she gets fed she'll be fine with it."

"Yeah, I don't know about you, but I'm still hungry." Reborn whacked her in the side of the head. He then pushed his half eaten meal towards the girl and she attacked it.

"Do you understand what I'm trying to say Bianchi?" She bit her lips but nodded reluctantly. "Good. Yue, once you're done eating, get out and go home."

"Aye aye captain hoe! I mean hooks!"

Reborn kicked her out the house.

* * *

The next day returned somewhat to normal because Yue had not acknowledged Tsuna or anyone else in fact. He was too busy getting in trouble. "Hibari-san, I honestly don't understand why I'm being forced to clean up the men's bathroom when I'm not the one that took a shit on the floor," Yue mumbled hesitantly, shying away under the prefect's glare. Why did Hibari have to be such a hot disciplinarian with a terrible attitude? He felt a cold chill run down his spine and hastily mopped the floors down with a monstrous chemical that just made the blue-tiled floors _sparkle_.

"You were the last one to be found in this restroom when it appeared, according to other people," Hibari snapped impishly. "If I were you, I would also watch your foul language."

"But Hibari-san, I didn't—!"

"You're testing my patience, Crossdresser."

Unwillingly, Yue closed his mouth and continued scrubbing the floors with pure annoyance. Slowly, he put the mop back into the bucket. "Done," he muttered angrily.

"Good. Now get out and don't do it again."

Yue tried holding in his tears; his eyes were on the ground, and he exited the bathroom calmly. Once he was far away, he looked out the school window and gazed at the setting sun. Shakily, Yue whispered to himself as hot tears trailed down his pale cheeks,

_"I should have taken a shit on his desk."_

* * *

**Me: Okay, I know I'm getting into the plot too quickly, but I have the need to. You guys need to know where this arc is, her background, and why she does it. YES, she will be the typical, "OH EM GEE. SHE'S PART OF THE VONGOLA FAMIGLIA. HOW TYPICAL!" Whatever. I don't care. I needed to do it to make her fit into the story just a little bit. YES. There WILL be more humorous chapters coming up, and there will definitely be more Hibari moments. Just give it time. I'm sorry for the late update. I had to focus on learning how to drive to get my permits so I hope you guys understand. **

**Gokudera: Fuck you. Lazy asshole.**

**Me: But baby... T^T**

**Gokudera: No buts. **

**Me: AND THANK YOU FOR THE 21 REVIEWERS! I APPRECIATE IT. My heart just burst into flames out of happiness. Of course those who favorited and put it on story alerts made me blush too, but shoutout to all the reviewers! I love you guys! YAMAMOTO, HERE'S YOUR CUE!**

**Yamamoto: I'll make you guys sushi for reviews?**

**Me: That's too weak.**

**Yamamoto: You're right...I'll _take off a clothing for a review._**

**__Gokudera: Stripping for reviews? -_-**

**Me: That includes you too.**

**Gokudera: FUCK!**

**Me: Reviews are indeed appreciated along with naked hot anime boys.**


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